Flexible Fathers?

It heartened me to read this week that Mark Zuckerberg will take two-months paternity leave when his daughter is born. Even more so, was the information that he is breaking the “Facebook Taboo” of not taking the full-four months parental leave offered to all employees. In the USA, where they are decades behind the UK for maternity and paternity leave, there have been recent reports of shift to paid leave for both parents. It will be interesting to see if the Chief Executive’s work pattern is reported when he is back at work; will he be taking the opportunity to work more flexibly?

I recently attempted an experiment using my social media channels. I asked Dads to contact me and share their experiences and reasons for working flexibly; from part-time to remotely. I also wanted to speak to Dads who wanted to work flexibly but can’t.

So I sat and watched my inbox in anticipation; waiting for the influx of stories. Of Business Development Mangers with home bases to job-share scientists and everything else in-between.

And I waited …

I am still waiting.

Nothing. Nada, not one story has come to me.

Does this mean that not-one of my hundreds deep, contact list work in this way? I doubt it. I KNOW some of them do. Is it a reflection of how they view this arrangement – is it hidden, is it not considered flexible, is there a level of discomfort?

The other area that equally was non-responsive was the desire to work flexibly. Anecdotally when I speak to friends, especially Dads, the conversation often starts how they would LOVE to work more flexibly; to do the school run, to have longer days for more time at the end of the week but. And that is the clincher, there is always a BUT. But “you just don’t ask for things like that”, BUT “it wouldn’t be accepted” BUT “I don’t want them to think I am not committed”.

This saddens me; whilst there are still leaps and bounds to be made in supporting mothers through flexible work, there needs to be equal time and “policy space” given to Dads. Ironically, a 2013 study found that men were more likely to have a flexible working request approved than women, regardless of their level of seniority or reason for the request; which leads me to believe that the policies and employer willingness is there; just there seems to be a breakdown of communication somewhere!

With the change in shared parental leave, where Dad can share some of Mum’s leave, there is the expectation that the early days of a baby’s life will be shaped by both parents in a way that hasn’t been available before. However, as the caveat for the leave is the Mum “handing over” some leave for Dad to take (and I am not sure if this something that will be taken up for a range of reasons not just restricted to financial ), the wish for flexible work for both parents will grow.

Am I wrong, do more Dads work part-time than I believe? Would love to hear from you!