Why you need to worry constructively

Worry takes up an awful lot of time. However much you try to push it away, it sits, lurking just at the back of your brain. The level of emotional energy it takes to stop it from interfering with your day-to-day life is hard to quantify, but you very noticeable. But what if you took a new approach. Rather than avoiding the issue or situation that is causing you concern, you schedule some time to worry. Rather than finding ways to avoid your concern, you craft out opportunities to constructively worry?

It seems like for every area of our lives, find times to do things. Our working days are scheduled, with to-list and targets; when it comes to family lives, we have diaries full of activities, appointments, and birthdays. We use those deadlines as information to break down what needs to be done; from journeys to dance classes to purchasing presents and or writing emails. All these things have an order and process. There are cognitive processes behind them, a start, a middle and an end.  

When life is going swimmingly, often when we feel resilient and capable, are the times when we worry less. The challenges life throws at us are dealt with almost unconsciously. However, there are times that the issue that we having to deal with is just too large. The implications too great and the energy isn’t quite there. It is then when that concern is parked somewhere within our psyche, to reappear at the most inconvenient time (usually just when we are dropping off to sleep!)

How would it feel to make a conscious decision to make time to worry? Yes, it sounds counter-intuitive, but hear me out. Imagine carving out some time in your diary, maybe 15 minutes a day, where you know you can think. You give yourself permission to not have to deal with whatever is bothering you right; you delay your attention to a later point when you have more headspace.

 

What is the purpose of worrying?

 

Worry is the cognitive process that is associated with anxiety; it usually happens when we are concerned about something that may happen, that could impact us or when we feel out of control. It’s something that we do to try and overcome our concerns or to predict the future, but it’s often not constructive!

As the quote rightly says:

“Worry is like a rocking chair: it gives you something to do but never gets you anywhere”  Erma Bombeck

You already have the skills to constructively worry, it just takes a simple reframe. It may sound strange, but it’s not a concept that is alien to us. It’s actually something we do all the time, just under a different guise.

Whenever you sit down to research something or discuss a pressing matter, you are problem-solving. Whenever you join a meeting at work to brainstorm, you are scheduling your problem-solving. Ultimately, the purpose of constructive worry is to problem solve.

It’s been found time and time again when people have the space to think, to focus and to consider options, they innovate. A great example of this is within the company Google. They allow each staff member to dedicate 20% of their working time to professional projects. Interestingly more than half of the products or projects Google releases are created within that 20% time. Granted, Google has a financial incentive to craft out this time for their team, but it shows that allocating time to intentionally problem solve has some great outcomes! 

So how does this relate to constructive worrying? 

 

The first step is to carve out your thinking time. Plot some space in your diary and leave it clear. The next time a NON-URGENT problem arises, delay dealing with it until you can, during this thinking time. Go as far as to mark it in your diary, so you are consciously telling your emotional self that THIS WILL BE DEALT WITH.

 

When that time arrives, one of two things will have occurred.

 

1. The worry is no longer an issue. It’s either resolved itself or is no longer a concern.
2. You now have the headspace to be able to look at it.

 

Now it’s time to constructively worry. Start with reframing it. You are now problem-solving! How much more positive does that sound? 

Ask yourself coaching questions. These questions are placing you into a problem-solving mode, at a time when you are not responding from a place of fear, stress, or pressure. That is the environment you need to solve problems, and not let them overwhelm you. Not sure how? Then let me share some impactful questions:

 

• What is the worst that can happen?
• How do I want this to be fixed?
• Who else can help?
• What other options do I have?

So next time you start to worry, just remind yourself that now is not the time to solve this problem. Instead, hold off until you can give it the attention you need and get ready for your innovation to begin! 

 

Would this work for you? Is constructive worrying the way forward? Come over to the Facebook Group, Creating Careers to Enjoy, and share how you manage your worries.