The Balance Collective Ask Me Anything – How can I refocus my career now my children are older?

I’ve been fortunate to support numerous clients through various stages of their parenting journey. Over the past nine years, those babies, toddlers and pre-schoolers have blossomed into children, tweenagers, teenagers and adults! As children grow, parents evolve too, and with that, career aspirations often shift. In today’s Ask Me Anything, I’m addressing a question that may resonate with you:

 

How can I refocus my career now my children are older?

 

Whether you’re employed, self-employed, a freelancer, running a business or looking to return after an extended break, it’s not unusual for your work-related desires and needs to change over time.

 

In our children’s early years, we often mould our careers to create the balance necessary for them, ourselves and our families. However, as they grow and develop, their needs change. Older children may have more independence, whilst their emotional needs evolve. The life you’ve built around varying needs may now have room for change.

 

It’s no surprise that refocusing one’s career as children grow older is a frequent goal when I’m working with mums and dads on a one-to-one coaching basis. From understanding “what next” to crafting the best CV and application form to showcase your skills, it all begins with self-reflection. Today, I’d like to share three questions to help you understand what you want and need for the next chapter in your life.

 

1. What do you mean by ‘refocus’?

 

I’m not being intentionally awkward or pedantic; this is to help you understand what you mean by your overall statement.

– What is your definition of ‘refocus’ (and is this what you mean)?

– What are your current career aspirations?

 

Still stuck? Try the tried-and-tested coaching question: “If you could guarantee success, what would you do?” It’s a great way to open your imagination to possibilities. And let’s be honest, it’s a fun question to answer.

 

Once you have this clarity, move on to the next step.

 

2. What do you need?

 

Many factors impact the energy, attention, finances and time you need right now: your children’s ages, their individual needs, your other responsibilities, your health, your finances… the list goes on.

 

When you consider these, it’s easy to start finding reasons why things can’t change. So, let’s force your brain to think of possibilities! Break down your success measures for your career, which can be as wide and varied as you want. Clients often use measures like income, progress, knowledge, skills (learned and used), relationships, energy (how you feel on an average and a good day), and finally, what your world looks like outside of work.

 

Often, having these benchmarks can help you see where your current situation fits the bill and the areas you want to focus on changing.

 

3. Connect (and reconnect) with your network

 

The identity we have as working parents often operates on a time lag. What people may know about you (and the assumptions they draw from that) will be working on a different timeline to your own beliefs, expectations and plans. So, whilst you’re going through the process of deciding what you want next, start sharing this with others around you. Tell them who you want to be in this next phase and make sure it’s both in your personal and professional circles. It’s not about quantity; it’s about quality. Who do you know that can help you with your career plans?

 

With these three areas in mind, you’ll be in a better position to decide what you want to do next. And you know what? If staying exactly where you are now still meets your needs, then that’s OK. A career to enjoy is YOUR version of success, not the definitions of others (especially not mine!)

 

I regularly answer questions in my Facebook group to help YOU create a career to enjoy, not endure. Find the previous Q&A blogs here.