What are you good at? Like, really good at? There is a good chance, at some point in your career, you have been asked this question. It may be at interview; it may be at a business pitch or part of a conversation with a manager. It may not have been asked that directly; it may have been phrased in a different way. But ultimately, the answer you give will show how your skills, experience and outlook are making a difference. But, are you confident in the impact you are having on the world?

So often we are raised to stay humble, not to brag and show off. Your credentials are hidden away under a layer of modesty.

But, when you are looking to progress in your career or develop your business, you need to be able to identify what you are good at, why you excel and how they make an impact. Whilst it can help to be surrounded by champions and supporters, this can only start with one person.

No, not a mentor.

And you know what I am going to say.

That person is you.

What is confidence?

Now, this is where it can get complicated.

Confidence is something that people want and need, yet there isn’t a one size fits all approach. There are cultural differences around confidence. Gender differences – or, let’s be honest, gender biases – around what it looks like. It can present differently at different life stages. In an ever expanding neurodivergent world, confidence varies from person to person. Confidence, and your impact on the world can vary;  physical confidence, relationships, skills, experience.

The list can go on.

Even the professionals can’t agree on what confidence is or looks like (I know, I’ve researched into it!). The things Psychologists DO agree on, is that someone can be confident that they can complete a task (often also noted as self-efficacy) but not self-confident as a personality trait or in their behaviour. That there is lots of cross over between the two, and whilst the scientific community look into this, the rest of the world is suffering from an epidemic of insecurity!

 

 

 

 

Now, this blog isn’t intended to be a module from Psychology 101, but I want you to start asking yourself what do you mean by confidence.  When you are considering YOUR career or business confidence, what do you actually mean by this?

Have you fallen into the trap of using the word with no real context or concept of what it means?

Are you being asked to PROVE your confidence without any guidelines or targets to what that looks like?

Are you judging yourself with unrealistic expectations and setting yourself up to fail.

Have you got yourself into the trap of assuming that confidence is an innate personality trait, and not measuring what you can do and the impact it makes on the world?

 

 

 

 

Today, I want you to answer these simple questions, to start building up YOUR VERSION of confidence. Not the scientific version or even what others think is important!

1. What do you do well?
2. How do you know you are doing them well?
3. How does it make you feel?
4. What do others tell you about what you do well?
5. What have you achieved recently that really scared you?
6. What did you do to prepare for it?

And finally

7. What have you learned about yourself from this insight?

Now, answer me again:

What impact are you making on the world?

These answers are the beginnings of your internal brag book; a chance for you to built your evidence of what you are good at, and the impact you are making on the world. Just imagine how it would feel to do this once a week, or even every day, and have pages and pages of evidence that you are really quite wonderful if your own niche way!

In a world that profits from telling us we aren’t good enough, isn’t it time we start redefining what success is? When you reach that new, purposeful and meaningful definition, and you notice that you are making progress, then your confidence will come.

Want to read more about confidence on the blog?

Check out:

Crisis of Confidence? How one question can help.

Do you know what confidence is?

How to stop self-sabotage.

 

Join over 500 parents looking to create a career they enjoy not endure over on Facebook.