Reflections following Maternal Mental Health Awareness Week 2023

I’m in a reflective mood this week, after witnessing and taking part in 2023’s Maternal Mental Health Awareness Week (1-7th May). This year it felt like this week has tipped into the wider public consciousness. Every day I would see the hashtag “Maternal Mental Health” used across every social media platform, with organisations highlighting the variety of support they offer, and individuals sharing their personal journeys. This amplification of a vocal message is clarified by this year’s theme; we are stronger together. Sharing our experiences was powerful and healing, and it showed that we are never alone in our struggles.

 

 

This message is being echoed across industry too. I was proud to be part of an article by HR Magazine, simply titled “How should HR support employees with postpartum depression.” Not if, but how. The power of this awareness week is highlighting the reduction in taboos. It’s estimated 1 in 5 women will experience a mental health condition during pregnancy or during the first year of their baby’s birth. Just look at the stat. Then look at your organisation. You likely have parents within your team who need additional support for their mental health. Bringing this awareness into the policy decisions will lead to a culture that helps them. 

 

On the 2nd of May, I had the privilege of chatting with Eve Canavan, Co-Founder of the Perinatal Mental Health Partnership, and let me tell you, it was one of the toughest, yet most rewarding Instagram lives I have ever done! 

We dove deep into the topic that is often swept under the rug, of returning to work after baby loss and maternal mental health illness, as part of Maternal Mental Health Awareness Week.

Sharing our experiences was powerful and healing, and it showed that we are never alone in our struggles. 

 

Today I wanted to have a permanent place to commit the advice and recommendations I shared on this hour-long live. Below contains, in part, my reflections having returned to work with maternal mental health struggles following two baby losses, and that of an experienced and qualified Career Coach, working with parents. 

 

If you are ready, you can find the full reply on their page. However, these are the potted highlights that I hope will help you start to heal.

 

DON’T BE AFRAID TO ASK FOR HELP 

You don’t have to protect others’ emotions. Your colleagues, friends and leaders want the best for you. So, at ANY point during or after your return, you can ask for what you need. That may be temporarily moving desks away from a pregnant colleague, a phased return, a change in duties or agile working to support your therapeutic support.

 

YOUR STORY ONLY BELONGS TO YOU

You can tell people as little or as much as you want. What you say and when you say it can change, and that is fine. 

I am going to digress right now and talk to Managers. Please do not share anything with colleagues without the parent’s permission. It’s essential to respect boundaries.

 

CRAFT BOUNDARIES WITH SCRIPTS

This is a direct way to communicate with your colleagues about what you are comfortable talking about. One straightforward way is to email everyone that you work with and tell them! You can also prepare yourself with set answers to questions as you notice the themes arising. 

 

FIND YOUR BODY AND BRAIN CONNECTION

You are entering a new phase in your life, which is unknown. Feeling anxious is a human reaction to this situation. It is not a character flaw. Find out what you can control and connect with your body and find tools to calm your nervous system.

 

GIVE YOURSELF TIME TO ADJUST

Ask for a return-to-work induction, to help you transition back. Get at the questions answers – what, where, how, when, who and whys – and start to reintroduce yourself to the work. It will come back, just be as patient with yourself as you would be with someone else. 

 

 

GRIEF IS A PROCESS

You are grieving the life you imagined, and eventually, your experiences will mean that the grief will adjust in intensity and frequency as time goes on. 

 

It goes without saying that you can ask for help. PMHP have some great resources that you can access. Please share this with anyone you think would benefit and continue to follow the great work of those highlighted throughout the week.