Four (unexpected) lessons on confidence

The best personal development books, in my humble opinion, can transcend their core theme. They encourage you to think, reflect and challenge your beliefs about yourself and the world, and often pop up in conversation as a passionate recommendation. The strapline for my work as a career and return coach is all about creating a career to enjoy, however, there are factors within that we work on; one of which is confidence. So today, I wanted to share with you four unexpected lessons in confidence, from four books reviewed as part of my Book Club.

 

Book Review: The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown – The Balance Collective

Nothing changes without digging deep

At the end of each chapter, Brown gives examples of how to D.I.G. Deep; in her research, she had noticed those who lived a wholehearted life would draw on D.I.G. when things were hard. It moves against so many assumptions about the ease with that others live their lives or focus attention on the wrong place. It’s intentional and draws on the elements that are important to that person, in each circumstance; working with who you are. So, remember to D.I.G:

 

D: Deliberate in thoughts and behaviours through prayer, meditation or simply setting intentions.

 I: Inspired to make new and different choices.

 G: Going. Act!

 

Book Review: “Joy at Work” with Marie Kondo and Scott Sonenshein – The Balance Collective

Tidy Work also means where you put your time and energy; you are more in control than you believe. 

If you were 100% in control of your workday, would it look the way it does right now? What would you change and what would you keep the same? These are key processes that are suggested in the book. Take some time to pay attention to where your time and energy go, and to consider if it’s valuable, worthwhile, and, most importantly, if it brings you joy. Then you start to declutter; removing interactions, people, and meetings that aren’t needed, so you can really focus on the things that bring you joy!

 

Book Review: The Comparison Cure by Lucy Sheridan – The Balance Collective

Comparison has a function and there is a power in it! 

In the introduction, the evolutionary function of comparison is laid out very plainly. It helped us survive, it helped us socialise. Feelings of comparison are a normal human state; it is not failure that you feel this way. However, there are times that these feelings overwhelm and control in a way that isn’t helpful or functional.

So, you now know that feeling comparison is human, so let’s make sure you use it as a motivational tool: upward social comparison We are encouraged to change the language and reframe comparison as aspiration. Consider the steps that the person you are comparing yourself to took and see how you could also reach a similar goal. Suddenly it becomes a lot more positive and achievable, right?

 

Book Review: How to Fail by Elizabeth Day – The Balance Collective

 

If we remove failure, can we experience success?

 “Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavour”. Truman Capote. The book opens with this quote setting the scene for the necessity of the concept of failure. I love how all examples are all framed as lessons learnt and that even those most “successful people” – dependent on how you define success – can list their personal failures. However, we are encouraged to remove or minimise failures, even down to the filters on our photos and curated social media feeds. It’s no surprise that we feel like we ‘shouldn’t’ fail.

 

So, there you have it, four lessons that, once noted, can lead to building your confidence. Do you agree with my choices? I’d love to know if you have read these books, or which other titles you would recommend. Come over to Creating Careers to Enjoy to find out the latest read long and join the movement to have a career to enjoy. 

 

Read the other book club reviews.